Book Expo America ’15 Recap

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The #BEAhangover is real. But I wouldn’t trade it for the world!

Pure, unadulterated happiness

Pure, unadulterated happiness

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I’m a Little Rusty But Here It Goes…

Between some serious seasonal depression, new job/coworkers, and settling back into life with my beau, it’s been hectic to say the least. But with BEA and Bout of Books coming up, I really wanted to get back in the swing of things. So here I am, announcing to the world, I’m back bitches and stronger than ever!

Just last night, I was lying in bed thinking about my undergrad thesis. I graduated from Pratt Institute’s creative writing program. To complete the program, every undergrad had to write a 60 page work of fiction with a 10 page introduction. Yeah, that’s right, 70 pages total thesis for an UNDERGRAD program. Pratt don’t play when it comes to art. I was thinking back and remembering how little time I spent on revising and how much I’d love to go back and polish it up. Then I thought, well you have a blog dummy, go write something on that first.

It’s funny how things work out that way. I’ve missed you guys. I’ve missed writing. But most of all, I’ve missed reading. Here is my pledge to read every day, no matter how much, and to reach out more. The book blogging community is filled with such kind and passionate people. I definitely want to put names to faces when I see most of you at BEA next month!

  

Blogging Slumps, All The Cool Kids Are Doing It

I’ve been conspicuously absent lately and you know what, I don’t care. I’m so tired of feeling guilty about things that I just didn’t want to do. I never want blogging to feel like a chore or an assignment – I’m almost twenty-five dammit and it’s high time that I start enjoying my spare time because it’s only going to get busier from here on out. Marriage, children, careers, 401K, it’s all looming on the horizon and I need someplace to be able to vent, fangirl, and just be me. If I can’t do that on this blog then I don’t know what else is left. Therefore, when I don’t feel like blogging, I’m not going to push myself to post something. Besides, I’m pretty sure that you, the reader, can tell when something is forced and when the writer is truly passionate about the subject. So in the end it benefits both parties.

There are three reasons why I wasn’t posting as much as I used to…

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Summer

The fact of the matter is that I didn’t want to be on my computer more than I had to when the weather was so beautiful. For the first time in years I was living near the coast and had easy access to multiple beaches. I wanted to enjoy the season, period.

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Uncertain future

While my relationship status is a whole hell of a lot better than it was in say February, there were still issues that we weren’t talking about. I wanted so badly to move back in with him but he was hesitant to discuss it and this really had to be his idea. I made the mistake once of deciding to move in without taking into account his feelings/doubts. I wasn’t about to do it twice. So I spent the whole summer in limbo, not knowing where we stood. I didn’t know what to do about us, my job, or how to bring it up. Basically it was a whole lot of worrying and anxiety for months.
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Depressed

I’m going to really honest – I don’t feel like I have any close friends at the moment. My closest friends are drifting away simply because we live so far away and none of us are great at keeping in touch. It’s definitely something I’m trying to improve but it’s a work in progress. I’m decently close with my coworkers but I don’t get invited to anything one on one – it’s always a work group outing. I keep trying to tell myself that deep, meaningful friendships don’t happen overnight but it’s hard when you don’t feel like you have one to fall back on while you make more.
Additionally, my family is causing a lot of anger and frustration. Passive-agressiveness reigns king and no one knows how to choose their battles. Guilt, hypocrisy, and constant arguing are only some of the wonderful things that I experience once I get back to the house. I keep picking up shifts at work because I need the money AND it’s an excuse not to be around my family.

Yeah…
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Bottom line, there was so much going on emotionally and mentally that I just didn’t have the capacity to blog. Reading, specifically rereading some old favorites, has been the only thing keeping me sane. But the beau has intimated that he wants me to live with him again, I’m avoiding my family wherever possible, and my job allows transfers between locations so things are starting to look up. I want to talk to you guys and use this blog as an outlet for my passions again. And I feel like I’m finally in the head-space to do so.

Have a great day with an even better book! 

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Book Reviews are NOT scary!!

I have SO many reviews piling up but I’m still dragging my feet with writing them all. This little brain fart was going to be a side note in the review I’m working on now for Let’s Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson (which I read back in August, UGH!!!) but I figured that it was going to be lengthy enough to be it’s own separate post so….voilà!

A small comment on the post title…I immediately wrote it with the intent of  both motivating myself and proving its veracity. So far, neither has prevailed.


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